Nazareth College believes that an important
part of the residential learning experience is getting to know and
deal with new friends in a new environment. We have tried a variety
of methods of selecting roommates including a special questionnaire.
None of the methods have emerged as best. As a matter of fact, most
national studies show that successful roommate pairings are the
same if done randomly as when prospective students are matched by
a questionnaire.
When
making room assignme nts, we take into consideration the preferences
you indicate on your application-contract and related materials.
We make every effort to honor one of your top three choices. Due
to a high demand for certain spaces, however, we may not be able
to do so. Rooms are restricted on the basis of gender only. We will
not house smokers with nonsmokers as indicated on your housing application.
We do not assign rooms and will not make room changes on the basis
of race, religion, national origin, or other such factors. We do
have specially designed facilities for those with physical disabilities.
We do not encourage best friends from home, twins, or siblings to
live together as roommates. Our desire is to have new students broaden
their horizons and friendship base.
We feel that an important part of the residential
learning experience is getting to know and become comfortable with
new people in a new environment. As you will see when you read through
our literature, the Residential Life program can play a significant
role in the educational process. We would like to help you adjust
to new situations and new experiences, enhance conflict resolution
and communication skills and prepare for living in limited space
with others your own age, particularly your new roommate.
You should look forward to residence halls living
and the roommate experience in the way most students perceive it--as
a positive and challenging
adventure. However, it would be unrealistic not to anticipate some
problems, differences of opinion, or less than enjoyable experiences.
Whenever two or more people share limited living and working spaces,
some disagreements or conflicts are inevitable. While our student
body is homogeneous in many ways, it is very diverse in others.
Part of student development is learning new things, exploring different
options, and weighing the consequences of various actions and responses.
Here are Seven Sensational Suggestions for getting
along with your roommate:
1. Communicate
2. Communicate
3. Communicate
4. Be flexible
5. Cooperate
6. Compromise
7. Negotiate
Where else, but in college, would they expect
you to live in a small space with a total stranger and like it???
Problems often arise when there is a lack of understanding and differences
in people are ignored. You cannot assume or expect that your roommate
will see things as you do or behave as you do. Your roommate may
not become your best friend, but by following a few tips, you can
have a successful year:
Communicate: Your roommate is not a mind reader
and cannot always know what you are thinking or feeling. You aren't
a mind reader either, so get into the habit of talking things over
with each other. Whenever you have a serious discussion, remember
the important lessons of kindergarten:
Expect success
Use "I" statements
All things go much better with cookies
and milk
Be open, honest and direct
Take turns
Ask questions when you are confused
Get help from others in authority
Discuss important issues such as sharing belongings,
what level of cleaning and chores you expect from each other, study
habits and visitors. In Residential Life, we have noticed a theme
to many of the personal conflicts which arise. Here are a few rudimentary
tips on some usual causes of conflict between roommates:
Sharing and Use of Personal Possessions
How much are you willing to share? Will you
share your clothes, but not your computer? How about toiletries?
What about sports equipment? It is perfectly all right not to
share. However, it is important that you express clearly your
attitude toward sharing at the beginning of the school year. When
in doubt, always ask permission if you wish to use or borrow someone
else's belongings.
Room-keeping Attitudes
Once your room is set up (which also may point
out differences in decorating tastes and lifestyles), it will
need upkeep. Often roommates have different concepts and standards
of neatness. Let your feelings be known early. It may be helpful
to make a monthly schedule of who will do what and stick to it;
be sure to review on a regular basis to fine tune.
Visitors to the Room
Realize that your roommate(s) will have other
friends and that you are living in a residence hall with many
students. There will be someone who wants to visit all hours of
the day and night. There will also be times when one person wants
to study in the room and another is just getting involved in a
lively conversation. How about when one roommate may want to party
when the other has to prepare for an exam? Be considerate and
expect consideration in return. Keep your wits about you, and
discuss any potential problem with your roommate.
Developing Friendships
As the year progresses, it is natural for strong
friendships to develop between students who are not roommates.
Try not to become overly dependent on your roommate for friendship.
In fact, you and your roommate may not become "friends" at all
in the true sense of the word. This does not preclude your being
friendly and respectful. Also, if you and your roommate do become
close friends, try not to become so exclusive so as to shut out
other relationships.
Study Habits
Some people study well with music playing;
others need total quiet. Some students prefer to study in their
room; others elect to go out. Some students study late into the
night; others prefer early morning or daytime hours. You and your
roommate will have definite preferences. The possibility of differences
in your study habits should be expected. Students who talk out
these differences early in the school year usually can make satisfactory
adjustments with respect to the rights and needs of each other.
Personal Habits
Most people share the same ideas on personal
hygiene; however, in a few cases, you and your roommate may differ.
Approach this topic as you would any conflict, gently but firmly.
Avoid being overly harsh and critical, but be honest. Open communication
is the basis for any good relationship.
Noise
There comes a time in every student's life
when the room, hall, or building will seem too noisy. Someone's
(or your own) music is too loud; an alarm clock wakes a student
intent on sleeping; a phone rings at 4:00 AM. These annoying situations
are common in large communities. The key is to keep your head
and strive to respond to the problem in an open and cooperative
manner.
*** This
information can serve as a guide and reference for your first year
at Nazareth College. If you need additional help in resolving problems
related to living in the residence halls, your Resident Assistant
(RA), or Area Director (AD) are available for consultation. It is
a good policy to talk with a more objective individual if a conflict
should develop between roommates. We hope that these suggestions
and observations will help make residence hall living a rewarding
experience for you. Welcome!!!
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